You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys
removed by black-market organ thieves.

My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose
thighs were these and what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans. And then the thieves struck again.

My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new butt was attached at least three inches lower than my
original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favor of long skirts.

Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really
getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time.

What could they do to me next?

When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story. Women of the world, wake up and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement
body parts -stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has
something 'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?

THIS IS NOT A HOAX.
This is happening to women everywhere every night!

WARN YOUR FRIENDS!

P.S. Last year I thought some one had stolen my Boobs. I was lying in
bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved
to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I
keep them hidden in my waistband.

==========================

Nazir, I think you have created a very nice forum. I would love to know more English expressions for example. The words which we are unable to find in dictionaries . I had a couple of words which I struggled to understand like pop socks and being poly.
Pop socks-podslednichki
Being poly-nezdorovitsya.
Please people, lets share and help each others to learn this bloody english

I would chage the subject from "let's learn English" to "British and American English" where we can discuss the similarities and differencess of the language (no offence,please, just a suggestion). I love British accents, for example, and it can be hard to understand if you have been exposed to just American English. And it is not just the accent we are talking about, but the usage of some words that could be quite different.

For example, Altynai, you wrote "to learn this bloody english". Bloody something is not used much in America. Americans say something like "freaking or F******* something".

OK, why not? But I dont know how to do that technically... Lets discuss everything about English

I always have troubles with British pronunciation, when I watch British movies. But because I love their movies, I dont care, it just takes more time for me to understand.

Or "damn" something )

By the way, who knows how to say in English - материться? Sorry, I'm just wondering
==========================

Ругатся или матерится одной и тоже- звучит примерно так- swearing or abuse.

Nazira,I think SWEARING is more suitable to use in arguments and abuse(another meaning is revile) is usualy happens with sombody like domestic abuse where they are under pressure. or there is lots of other meanings but not much suites for "materitsya"
Example:
Don't swear at me!
Topic name is"Domestic Abuse Awareness"
As you can see there is a bit of differense.

See, this is really confusing, cause I hear very often how people usually say - "I swear to God" or just "I swear" - in good meaning, trying to prove something.

==========================

good Point, " Swearing"- клянусь as well.... You can't say-" I swear, I could do More for You, blah-blah-blah" for example, so, meaning of this songs , more like in Good way, i guess.

You cant say to Your Loved One- "I swear to God"- in bad way. must be in good way.

it is an different time and different meanings.

Some Scotish Poetry, if is O.k. I hope.

Robert Burn. Poems and Song, in Scotish Lang.

To a Haggis

Fair fa' Your honest , sonsie face,
Great Chiefan o' the Pudding-race!
Aboon them a' ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or tharim:
weel are ye wordy of grace
As long's my arm.

The groaning trencher there Ye fill,
Your Hurdies like distant hill,
Your pin wad help to mend a mill
In time o'need,
While thro' your pores the dews distil
like amber bead.
His knife see Rustic-labour dight,
An' cut up wi' ready slight,
Trenching Your gushing entrails bright
Like onie ditch;
And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reekin, rich!
Then, Horn for Horn they stretch an' strive,
Deil tak the hindmost, on they drive,
Till a their weel-swall d' Kytes belyve
Are bent like drums;
Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
Bethanrit hums.

Is there that owre his French ragout,
Or olio that wad staw a sow,
Or fricasse wad mak her spew
Wi' perfect sconner,
Looks down wi' sneering, scornfu' view
On sic a dinner?
Poor Devil! see him owre his trash,
As feckless as a wither'd rash,
His spindle spank shank a guid whip-lash,
His nieve a nit;
Thro' bluidy flood or field to dash,
O how Unfit!

But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread,
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He'll mak it whissle;
An' legs , an' arms, an' heads will sned,
Like taps o'thrissle.

Ye Pow'rs wha mak mankid your care,
And dish them out their bill o'fare ,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
That jaups in luggeis;
But, if ye wish her gratefu' pray'r
Gie her a HAGGIS!!!

( should be readen with strong scotish "R") good luck, I may later- will gave You an English or russian version.
this is One of the Most My favourite Poem in the World.
Enjoy, Guy's!!!

N/A

Altynay,

as you live in GB, I thought that many people may understand scottish
Shahsanem, it looks nice and so cute
though I have also some difficulties to understand

Hi, I may have today- an English- version. actualy- it's hard for Me too, but I love scotish Lang. even- have to read with special dictionary.

Aisuluu, there are 4-5 dialects spoken in GB. such as - Geordie-Newcatle,( area-I guess where Altynai located) London- Cocney,( All ppl from London) Liverpool-Scouse- it is only in England.

Scotland-in North side-ppl spoken- in Gaelic, Welsh- is Welsh lang. and Ulster Scotish, and very Old- scotish lang, which was written this Poem.

Only who was Born in Scotland could memorized this Poem,( as My Mum-in-low and Hubby) and I may will do, One day...

cool
thank you for your kind clarification on local accents

Differencess of the American English and British English
Vocabulary
candy-sweets
cookie-bisquit
crib-cot
crazy-mad
dumb-stupid
french fries-chips
hood-bonnet(on a car)
mad-angry
mean-nasty
one way(ticket-single(ticket)
parking lot-car park
chips-crisps
railroad-railway
resume-CV
vacation-holiday

spelling
analyze-analyse
center-centre
check-cheque
color-colour
defense-defence
jewelery-jewellery
liter-litre
neighbor-neighbour
organize-organise
pajamas-pyjamas
realize-realise
whiskey-whisky(scotish) and whiskey(irish)

This examples I took from my Practical English Usage book there is more words but I have chosen just' simple ones. I do recommend this book for people who wants' to improve his English very useful, written by Michael Swan. There is lots’ of things.

actually I have been in contact with both British and Americans and have noticed that sometimes British seems to be more soundfull for my ears
it depends also on the accent of the each person

Fit Like- You like our food- Abardonian accent.
More - mere - south of scotland
Nei bad- Not bad- Glasgow accent.etc.

Altynai, i even didnt realized such difference's.

Joke.
Two russian speaker's met in London.
- What's oc'lock?( сколько время)
- such much...( полдень)
-russian ? ( Русский?)
- aaaaask... ( спрашиваешь....)

we call them - stockings

In New Zealand people put ay, at the end of the sentence... for example: Its a nice picture, ay? So it took me a while to get that!!!

Its so difficult to become fluent in English if you have to speak another language at home...

In Uk they use stockings for-чулки
hold ups-чулки с застежками которые застегиваются k suspender belt
suspender belt-пояс с подвясками.

Hi everyone,
This is a interesting topic. It feels like this topic is becoming one of the most hilarious topics like "Прикольные выражения на кыргызском языке "
There are a lot of slangs that I am not so familiar with. For instance, I hear when some people say
"That was the bomb"(maybe refering to food, movie or event?) It seems to me that maybe it means that it is the best thing....?
I also hear slangs like : " such a dork!" or "he is a dope"
and young girls reffered as "chiks" ( do we really look like chicks? )
And one more phrase, I don't know if it is a slang or expression but I heard a lot during the primaries and presidential election that H.Clinton and B.Obama were the one who "crack or break the glass ceiling"

Elnur well done to you,I think this is what all about this forum to share expressions which we hear on practice.
"That was the bomb"-yes ,this is one kind of showing their feelings ,to me it sound a bit rough but our language is not the perfect one.
"chicks" they whant to say naive or cute,
"he is a dope" another meaning is stupid(duren')
H.Clinton and B.Obama were the one who "crack or break the glass ceiling" this will explane more about this expression.
The campaign has long since been pregnant with historic possibilities, Mr Obama, bidding to become America’s first black president, first saw off a ferocious effort by Hillary Clinton to break the glass ceiling that has kept women from winning the White House. Then pushed John McCain, who had also breached his party's precedent by picking a female running mate in Sarah Palin, to the brink of defeat.

Altynai,
You "hit the right button". Your explanations cleary clarifies what I meant to say.
And one more thing I just remembered " You put the lipstik on a pig it is still a pig". I don't want to focus on political expressions but it seems to me that this particular expression has been used in any situations.

"You put the lipstik on a pig it is still a pig"-he he he that is a nice one I am going to use it in the future

After Second World War, a Lady MP was Chastizing Winston Churchill for being the worse of alcohol in a debate.
He said:

" Lady, I may be Drunk but I will be sober in the morning, You, however will always be Ugly".

Hope, My habby will help me To put an English version of Scotish Poem soon.

do you think its a nice expression! common... There are heaps of ugly people around... but I'm sure they dont wanna hear these expression directed to them (of course you would not tell them, but still)... /just my opinion-no offence/

+1. Кыял.

Dear Kiyal, this expression not necessarily should direct to ugly people although I think we haven’t got any ugly people, there is not beautiful people, This expression directs mostly in ad world. I hope this will help you.

If you've been on planet Earth in the last 24 hours, you've probably heard the phrase "If you put lipstick on a pig, it's still a pig" more times than you can count. Well, we at PETA would like to put our own spin on this phrase and let everyone know that there should never be any real reason for lipstick on a pig unless it's because you've just given a pig a big kiss for being so darn cute.

Next time you do your makeup in the morning, ask yourself, "Who was my lipstick tested on?" Rats, mice, and bunnies are still exploited in the world of product testing, and pigs are used for cruel experiments as well. And yes, pigs still suffer from abuse in the factory-farming industry.

We've thrown our own spin on this whole "lipstick on a pig" media frenzy and created the following two ads to make people think about where their cosmetics and their food come from. Check out our new ads, and please vote for your favorite by leaving a comment below!

iStockPhoto.com/Christian Lohman

yeah.... well, animal testing issues are very important BUT!!!!!! I reckon you changed the topic and mixing up things... There is nothing in common between your previous info about animal testing and this comment!!! Except the pigs of course... However... I would never dare to tell someone about someone: "You put the lipstik on a pig it is still a pig"...
Just never mind ok!!! If you really concerned about my opinion, than tell me in what kind of situations you yould use it...

If you've been on planet Earth in the last 24 hours, you've probably heard the phrase "If you put lipstick on a pig, it's still a pig" more times than you can count. Well, we at PETA would like to put our own spin on this phrase and let everyone know that there should never be any real reason for lipstick on a pig unless it's because you've just given a pig a big kiss for being so darn cute.

Next time you do your makeup in the morning, ask yourself, "Who was my lipstick tested on?" Rats, mice, and bunnies are still exploited in the world of product testing, and pigs are used for cruel experiments as well. And yes, pigs still suffer from abuse in the factory-farming industry.

We've thrown our own spin on this whole "lipstick on a pig" media frenzy and created the following two ads to make people think about where their cosmetics and their food come from. Check out our new ads, and please vote for your favorite by leaving a comment below!

iStockPhoto.com/Christian Lohman

sorry, Ppl do not talk about animal- testing. seriously, not an issue, meaning of "Lipstick on Pig"- more sarceaSm, then ever.( не гоните не в ту сторону-выражусь я на русском)...
This phrase Most likely ppl use in very Agricultural area.( more country side)
such as Lot's of ppl , who lives in sea side- they say: " she is that fish!!!".